dust to dust

we all live, we all die

at least i got to say goodbye.

2 more days of greeting relatives and family friends.

her lipstick shade is too pink though. she always wore it bright red.

the tent was done well. nice white sheets.

my job was to refill peanuts, melon seeds and sweets on the table.

i think tonight it will be collecting donations.

all in all, i think grandma would have liked her own funeral.

sg

i've been emergencied back to singapore

so here i am, back in my humid hot home country.

i realise that

1. i have flown about 15 times in 2008 & 2009. Mainly to and from melbourne, sydney and singapore. therefore, i have consumed at least 10 disgusting meals, survived crappy service and packed my whole life into suitcases and boxes 3 times. take this advice from me, a spoilt singaporean: stick to SIA. Qantas has a lot to catch up on.

2. aussie immigration don't have a problem with me but singapore immigration does. EVERY SINGLE BLOODY TIME the singapore immigration will ask me how i got my USA passport. once they hear the singlish accent coming from my mouth they will stamp my passport. this time coming back was even funnier:

i went into the singaporeans queue. and the officer is a chinese and there's a malay officer leaning against the booth flipping through those 'CNY specials' catalogue that supermarkets like to give out.

so the officer looks at me, looks at my passport, looks at me, looks at my passport, not convinced that it is actually me. then the malay officer asks 'eh what is dis buddha jump over de wall ting arh?' The chinese officer is abit preoccupied with making sure that the girl in front of him is really both american and singaporean so he goes ' er er er... is de....' and i pipe in helpfully "sharks fin" the chinese officer looks at me and then immediately stamps my passport, convinced i am actually a singaporean because of my answer.

3. i am apparently going to visit my ill grandma every day cause that is the expected thing of me to do, as the eldest daughter of my father. she’s quite unresponsive, not talking. but she does nod or shake her head and her eyebrows do lift up when i tell her something that she finds amusing. everyone thinks she doesn’t have much time left. secretly, i am hoping she can survive although rationally i know it isn’t a comfortable life she’s leading now. i once debated for euthanasia, and i believed what i was saying. now though, i find it difficult to reconcile my heart and my head

4. went back to GB for fellowship camp. i was a station mistress with manda. some idiot group greeted us with ‘good evening sexy mistresses’(mistresses to who?!?!) and ‘good evening chiobu-s’. Every squad that passed through our station had to greet us with some variation of hot, sexy, cool, pretty, beautiful. :D including marianne’s squad. i wish i could have taken a video of marianne calling me “ hot station mistress melissa” but sadly, nah. went for supper with manda, melia, stacey, pet, dodo, vera, seow & mak. also saw sam there. we were at KAP, and it was full of orientation groups. i felt so old. <YEAR 2 OF UNI> just kept booming in my head. but i was happy because manda was next to me, worrying as usual, and on the other side of me, melia was listening to pet pet and stacey nonsense and i was talking to mak and seow and dodo and vera were also talking and everything seemed, for awhile, like we went back in time to sec 4.

Summer love

its summer in Melbourne and the temperature is like 27 degrees. So much for a warm summer…

having the summer school people here is really fun cause they’re quite game for anything and we’re all foodies! :D

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When i go back to Sydney and i remember the albert house people, the summer of 2010 will be one of my best memories  <3

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<3

:D

i can’t wait to see all of them again:

My father’s side (excluding my 2 cousins)

My mother’s side is just too many to fit into one photo.

i think CNY is my favourite time of the year. Christmas just gets more boring as you grow older. CNY you get angpows, gambling, funny relatives and lots and lots of goodies.

The Office Prayer

Dear God,

Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,

The courage to change the things I cannot accept,

And the wisdom to hide the bodies of those people

I had to kill today because they really pissed me off,

And also, Lord, help me to be careful of the toes I step on today,

As they may be connected to the ass that I may have to kiss tomorrow.

Help me to always give 100% at work....12% on Monday, 23% on

Tuesday, 40% on Wednesday, 20% on Thursday, and 5% on Fridays.

And most importantly God, help me to remember

That when I'm having a really bad day,

And it seems that people are trying to piss me off,

That it takes 42 muscles to frown,

And only 4 to extend my middle finger and tell them to bite me.

cause & effect & 2 awesome books

everyone has gone home and walking to the suzuki night market(at queen vic market) tonight with grace, kendrick & melody made me realise that most of the asians are GONE
like there are actually the same number of caucasians and asian along swanston street.

wow
once a year migration
i wonder if this has any effect on anything

like in freakonomics
awesome book. i wonder if they'll have a degree in that kind of stuff. it basically applies economics to... non boring stuff like drugs and the klu klux klan. my favourite chapter is in superfreakonomics (the sequel) and its the epilogue about monkeys behaving like humans when they introduced the concept of MONEY to them (scroll down to read)

anyway, the main point of the effect thingy is illustrated in this story.

EFFECT: One of the states of USA was predicting a even higher rise in crime rate, everyone was fearing for their lives. but suddenly, the crime rates fell to super super safe. and everyone was wondering why.

CAUSE: Awhile back, all the states of USA were petitioning for legal abortion. illegal was super expensive, so only rich and middle class people were able to do it. and they succeeded in making it legal.

apparently, all the people who were supposed to commit crime (research shows that being from a poor, unstable home makes someone more likely to commit crime) were being aborted. so all those poor people were having legal, cheap abortions & those feotuses that were gotten rid of were the ones that was supposed to commit crime!

anyway, so the lack of asians in melbourne. what effect does that have? i wonder....


THE MONKEY STORY
so they put fake coins out on a tray to the monkeys one at a time in a seperate cage and the monkeys would have to exchange the coins for treats (jello or a piece of fruit) and one random day, a monkey tossed the tray back to the rest of the monkeys in the main cage and ran after the coins [bank robbery!]

and the researchers tried to get back the coins. but the monkeys wouldn't give up the coins unless the researchers gave them the treats in exchange for the coins [crime pays!].

so while giving the treats in exchange for the coins, the head researcher noticed a male monkey giving a coin to a female monkey. the researcher thought that the male monkey was showing kindness to the female monkey... instead. BAM. the first recorded instance of monkey prostitution. and 8 seconds later, the female monkey came up to the researcher to buy jello.

COOL RIGHT COOL RIGHT!!! sadly the experiment didn't continue cause the researchers thought that money was destroying their social interaction and their group. i would love to get my hands on that group of monkeys and see what happens. i reckon in 10 years time you would have prostitution, crime, abortions, bribery and a mafia in that monkey group

mlia

fml is so yesterday

here come mylifeisaverage.com
its for the inner nerd in you
the one that believes in ninjas, harry potters, monsters under the bed and most importantly, loves empty cardboard boxes.

:D

a few of the submissions:

Today, while staying at a hotel I saw a sign that read "Please don't drop your cigarette butts on the ground, the iguanas come out and smoke them and we're trying to get them to quit." MLIA

Today, I saw Grumpy from Snow White and the Seven Dwarves at Disneyland. I shouted, "OH MY GOD! HI GRUMPY!" He looked at me and gave me the finger. MLIA.

Today I was reading the back of my eyeliner, it said "tested on celebrities not animals." I laughed. MLIA

Today it was really foggy on my drive to school. I turned on the Pirates of the Caribbean soundtrack and pretended to be a pirate. MLIA.

Today, while shopping for my little brother in Toys R Us, i picked up a foam sword and swung it around a bit. I looked at the price, and underneath it was a warning. it said "CAUTION: not meant for actual combat with ninjas and/or zombies" Thanks for the warning. MLIA

pride and prejudice

marianne's joining gb

i'm happy cause i know she's going to have a great bonding time with everyone.
i think there are 2 actual reasons why i want her to join:
1) so that she won't be stuck with just SBC friends.

i've never liked the idea of segregation inside MG. when we as a level, as sec4s, were allowed to discuss any issue we wanted, we didn't ask for anything, all we were concerned about as the last non SBC batch was that the MG spirit would be the price of this seperation between "gifted" and "non gifted" students. its really a large price to pay for academic excellence

i figured if i could get marianne into the only cca that has both pri and sec sides meeting up with each other regularly, maybe she'll have more perspective on this and not see herself as better or more intelligent

2) so that she has something in common with me.
i always wanted someone to be proud of me every time i got another badge, another year, another achievement.
my parents were but i don't think they really understood how much it meant.

so when marianne gets her 3rd year, her rank, her first drill com trophy, her PBB, i'll be there to be ever so proud of her.

i still believe not all good things have to come to an end

Honestly what will become of me
don't like reality
It's way too clear to me
But really life is dandy
We are what we don't see
Missed everything daydreaming

Flames to dust
Lovers to friends
Why do all good things come to an end
Flames to dust
Lovers to friends
Why do all good things come to an end
come to an end come to an
Why do all good things come to end?
come to an end come to an
Why do all good things come to an end?

Well the dogs were barking at a new moon
Whistling a new tune
Hoping it would come soon
And the sun was wondering if it should stay away for a day 'til the feeling went away
And the sky was falling on the clouds were dropping and
the rain forgot how to bring salvation
the dogs were barking at the new moon
Whistling a new tune
Hoping it would come soon so that they could die.

not enough

claire's fb status:

"Let me tell you something about people like me. People like me feel lost and little and ugly and dispensable...It's like every morning I wake up and I fail. And I look around and everybody seems to be pulling up but somehow I can't. No matter how hard I try, somehow I'll never be enough."

- i am sam